Even though our 2 year anniversary has come, I can still clearly remember what I thought during this moment of our wedding. My world was in harmony and absolutely nothing could go wrong. At the time, our decision to move to LA was just a lighthearted dream and we had barely gotten used to living in our first apartment. Roofus was still in a foster home somewhere and I still had a full time job myself. We had no idea where our new path together would take us or what it would take to get there.
This very moment was a rare time when all of our worries seemed so insignificant to us and all was right in the world. We were surrounded by friends and family and nothing could get in the way of that. Our individual journeys through life were now about to become 1 and I simply could not wait to find out all the things we would do and discover together.
2 years later I cannot help but reflect on not only where we were, but on how far we’ve come. I will admit we still both had a lot to work on. We were still learning to compromise in general which given that we are opposites, remains an absolute necessity. Marriage is all about being flexible and learning to give to your spouse as much as possible.
I, for instance, tend to make a biblical mess when I cook. Instead of doing nothing to clean it up, I can at least clean the bigger pots and pans while Nita is happy to take care of the dishes. Also, Nita tends to put her makeup products everywhere and anywhere. Even in strange areas like between our bed sheets and in random crevices. I recognized that she needed some help organizing so eventually I built a shelf and structured all her makeup products to be within arms reach and grouped by the type of product. I’m sure you guys have seen it on her Instagram Stories and believe me, it makes life easier for both of us. These compromises are not set in stone either so sometimes if Nita is working longer hours than normal or seems stressed, I’ll just take care of all the dishes to make her life easier. If I’m fully engrossed in editing a video and would rather not be bothered, then Nita will go in the kitchen and whip up some dinner and also take care of Roofus so I’m free to work unfettered.
These are just some examples of ways we compromise to make each other happy and it is definitely worth the effort. Marriage is 100% hard work but when you put in the time and effort, the result is absolutely beautiful. We are 2 years into our marriage and the service we have put in has come to blossom into a wonderful partnership that I would not trade the world for. It’s come to the point where our compromises don’t even feel as such any more. Everything we do for each other just feels effortless and natural. We always try to serve each other as much as possible because it doesn’t feel like we are helping just our spouse, but our collective self.
We’re starting to subconsciously pick up one another’s little habits as well. I used to make fun of Nita for aggressively jiggling our front doorknob for a few seconds after I lock it just to be doubly sure that it is indeed locked. Of course after a while, I found myself doing the exact same thing as well! It turns out ‘better safe than sorry’ is pretty infectious.
Nita is not immune to this effect either. We used to argue about how I thought it was better to brush my teeth after eating breakfast because I would rather food not sit on my teeth all day. She thought it was disgusting and that everyone should brush as soon as they wake up. Well after a while, guess who was also brushing her teeth after eating breakfast too…. (sometimes)
It’s almost comical to compare ourselves 2 years ago to how we are now. We used to be 2 separate and very different people, and now we are much more the same person but in 2 different bodies. That is what marriage is all about. We have changed so much for the better in the last 2 years and I am absolutely looking forward to see how strong we will be for our 5th, our 50th, and beyond.